Thankfully, the ‘massive’ tsunami that was supposed to slam the Hawaiian Islands following the 8.8 earthquake in Chile never materialized. It was quite a scare getting roused out of bed by blaring alarms and scrambling to find a bus to my friend’s house on a hill overlooking Honolulu. Once there, however, it turned out to be a pristine Hawaiian day with no problems. We cracked beers on the roof top, watched the mass exodus of hundreds of boats from Honolulu harbors into the open ocean, and then watched them all return when the big wave never came. Ahh, barbecue, booze, and friends… that’s what natural disasters are all about!

Space Oddity

I’ve dreamed about doing this one for a long time: a no-moon, no-lights dive on Lighthouse Reef. Roatan has amazing bioluminescence, and on truly dark evenings they can be as brilliant and numerous as the stars in a clear night sky. Tonight, I finally get my chance to do it. We begin after sunset. As we descend down to the reef, I am amazed by how much I can still see in the waning light. Parrotfish nestle in to their holes and wrap themselves in mucus cocoons. Soldierfish and squirrelfish dart out from their alcoves. The reef is bathed in this eerie blue light that reminds me of hues I’ve only seen from Karl Stanley’s submarine. We careen through some » read more «

When Crazy Ladies Attack!

What I would give for a good night’s sleep… My trip to Utila has worn me out. A quick three-day, two-night jaunt over to The Other Island turned into a completely mental six-day whirlwind of scuba diving, Sambuca, fried pork, urinated bunk beds, beautiful women, and very, very late nights. But more on that in a later update. Still exhausted from the previous wild week, I decide to call it an early night. I try to finish my Utila trip report for the website, but the words aren’t coming. My battered brain and droopy eyelids prevent me from writing anything remotely coherent. (Not that much was coherent about the trip). My sophisticated, intelligent descriptions of my immature, depraved misadventures will » read more «

“I’m leaving tomorrow…”

…is apparently also a lie on Utila. I arrived on Roatan’s sister island via Captain Verne’s catamaran ($100 round trip Half Moon Bay, Roatan to Utila Town, Utila) on Tuesday. The plan? Hang out for a two nights, do a little skin diving, and return to the “real world” of Roatan on Thursday. Yeah, so about that plan… It’s Friday afternoon and I’m once again telling the lie, “Seriously guys, I’m leaving tomorrow.” This time, though, I mean it. Honestly. When I get back to Roatan’s blazing fast internet (think year-2000 speeds, as opposed to Utila’s 1994 speeds), expect deliciously debaucherous updates about my time here. I didn’t think an island could be more ridiculously bizarre than Roatan, but this » read more «